Unfolding

Its been a busy week this week but it still feels like it takes forever to make things happen.

Doesn't matter how much work you do it still feels as if the "prize" is always that little way out of reach - just enough to tantalise but never enough to satisfy. There is a saying in business that it always takes "twice as long and costs twice as much" - from personal experience I'd say that's true.

Apart from the impact of others on a project - waiting for people to get back to you, or to make decisions over things you don't control - the time taken for things to be fulfilled is often frustratingly slow for me. Of course, then I don't relax or take time out with the family or take some time out for myself and that just makes everything seem to take longer because I am never in any downtime.

Then I start making mistakes. I want to move things along so I hurry decisions that should be refelected on. The costs mount up as you have to re-visit things.

I have to consciously remind myself that life and the Universe are an unfolding process. That there is a season for things and no amount of impatience on my behalf will change that.

There are lessons and secrets I am meant to see but do not, as a I rush by with "my eyes on the prize". My childrens laughter at their horseplay annoys me when it should be something I take part in. I get annoyed (and sulk inside!) when my wife drags me away from my very important work (which could wait 'til the working week) to visit a garden centre so that we can as a family share the experience of designing a garden we will all share in the future.

Experiences that can never be re-visited. Memories that could enrich the fabric of my life.

This week I'm going to draw a breath before I think, say or act. I'm going to "reflect not reflex" and maybe the universe may unfold very differently.